There's this very potent thing that runs in my family, partly inherited, incredibly strengthened through my life experiences, and at times very unbelievable in accuracy, at least it cannot be explained by current ideas of institutional "logic."
That would be dreams. My siblings and mother have them, we're always in tune with each other. Yet, beginning this year and because of some intense life experiences, I started becoming in tune with other people who weren't just my siblings and mother. My best friend, new folks I met here, friends back home, people I had never met but would meet soon. I'm more comfortable talking about it openly now, because I realized it's a part of me that isn't going away, a part of me that has incredible world changing potential, and a part of that essence I now know and value within myself.
I could call it intuition, I could call it clairvoyance, I could call it telepathy, psychic ability, and a myriad of other terms that have come to confuse our lives and deemed to the realm of pseudoscience. What I call it now is: reality. It became very clear to me this year that the images in my head were not imagined dreams of a guy going insane, they were the thriving of an ancient connection and ability that wanted to be utilized for the better in me.
I reached the lowest point I had ever been emotionally in my life. Then I said, what if all these thoughts are not just in my head, but what if all these things I'm feeling about other people are coming from them? True to my nature, I cautiously, vigorously, meticulously, and patiently began to ask folks what they were thinking, what was going on in their lives, and what they thought of me. I didn't tell them my dreams and thoughts quite yet, I wanted to be sure what I was seeing was real. Very rapidly, I began to realize that thoughts and emotions are not a private matter, especially when concerning me, and that I had to figure out how to navigate this life long ability if I wanted to stay sane. I realized that when people thought of me, I could feel it, many times I knew what they were thinking, and occasionally if the thought was strong enough, I could see the imagery in my own head. Discovering this about oneself would likely terrify most people, or at least have them check themselves in to the looney bin. however, I'm a curious person, and so I decided to go with my hunch that there was something else there. That's when I started to write down my dreams.
Writing them down helped me flush out a ton of anger, many non-resolved issues I had been carrying my whole life. Writing them down created a safe space where I could let my thoughts free without judgement or interpretation from anyone but myself. I got it all out, and I began to discover some incredible things about myself.
Much of the time, we create our own realities. This is why there is so much truth in the idea that you need to stay positive if you want a better life. You will attract the type of energy you put out there, it's kind of just a law of nature. Much of the time, the anger and the pain that surrounds you is because you are unwilling to take responsibility for your own creation. This is the most bitter pill to swallow I've found, that your thoughts create your external environment, not only how you perceive that environment, but the things that will come your way. To cope with this, society has told everyone they are crazy, that their thoughts can be medicated, and that our private lives don't directly influence our public lives. The mind is way more powerful than the modern world has given it credit for, but much of the time this is a lesson we need to learn for ourselves. I had to fall apart and tear myself to shreds to get to the real foundation that exists in there, where the only thing that matters is what I think about myself.
That was a lesson I learned well. Basically, my dreams are not just my thoughts. I dip into lived thoughts, memories, and actions, and they dip into me. What is real isn't only what we've been told to believe, but the fairytale loveliness of life as well. I used to often wake up disoriented, like I had been traveling far and wide and to many places, but I could never remember. Since I write my dreams down and am better at remembering them now, I've learned that the reason I would have to constantly remind myself where I was when I woke up is because my spirit/thoughts/soul/etc. would literally travel these distances to interact with the people I love. It wasn't until I started remembering the rich detail in my dreams and asking the people in them what they were doing at the exact time I had those dreams that I realized that I was literally observing what was going on around them and what they were thinking about. I've been doing this my whole life, but only recently did I discover I wasn't crazy. Well, not in the sense that I must go to the crazy house anyway, still in the sense that I can be seemingly spontaneous (but even then I've planned and analyzed thoughts and emotions for a long time before acting).
So yeah, my name is Ainan, my sixth sense is strong and I'm developing it, I do some incredible things with my mind that many folks as well as modern science and understanding easily disregard as impossible, unbelievable, or insane, but that doesn't bother me much anymore. It would be easy to regard my thoughts as such if they weren't so damn accurate as much as they are. I've never been a fan of secrets or mystery, so feel free to ask me anything about anything. I take life in stride, and I go with what I feel, knowing that my emotions are the creators of my reality, and that love should always be the foundation. I have a ton of wonderful people in my life who love me and I love them. I learn by making mistakes and grow by staying curious, so not much scares me, and I love to play. Nice to meet you. I think I remember you from a dream I had the other day. What was your name again?
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